Push

Review by Jason Donner

 

Superpeoples walk among us and are fighting a secret war for their freedom which means that us muggles have got to be the most unobservant people on the planet not to notices the hypersonic screamers and tables flying through the air.

This is only a sampling of the giant gaping plotholes in Push, the story of two superpeoples played by Chris Evans and Dakota Fanning trying to get a powerful drug away from the evil Djimon Hounsou who is trying to control superpeoples all over the world.

By the mighty hammer of Thor, if it wasn't bad enough that Push is dumber than a bag of hammers, it's almost as boring as trying to have a conversation with that same bag of hammers.  Sure, it's flashy and hyper like a Chihuahua on a sugar rush, but there are plenty of times that you can tell the sugar rush ends and the movie crashes - those pretty action sequences just dissipate in your head like they never happened at all.

What's worse is that Push acts like it's going to be the first installment of a franchise which makes me wonder what the heck we as a planet did to these people that makes them want to threaten us with more Push movies.  What are they going to call the next one, Pull?  Perhaps they should just settle for Bull because that's all that Push and its TV pilot of a plot offers - piles and piles of bull.

Push obeys no laws of logic or common sense to get to a final act that relies so much on coincidence and miracles that is stretched all credence to the breaking point.  This movie is a load of superhero hooey and idiocy with a terrible story and boring characters.  Obviously, someone in Hollywoodland saw Heroes' first season and wanted to capitalize on it.  Amazingly, this movie is actually worse than Heroes' second season.

Some of the action is rather fun, but Push is just brainless dribble that will cause the logic centers of your brain to explode in frustration.  Best leave this one be.