Drag Me to Hell

Review by Jason Donner

 

Christine Brown  is a normal everyday girl.  She's never hurt anyone intentionally, she's never killed anyone, she's never cheated on her taxes as far as I know and yet, despite all of this, Christine is going to Hell in three days because she pissed off a very old and very evil Gypsy who cursed her.

That's right, kiddoes, it's Drag Me to Hell, the latest from Sam Rami and, being from Sam Rami you know it's going to be a horror movie on crack and, as someone who loves horror, that's damn good crack indeed.

This movie is insane to the point that it needs to be put in a padded room so that it won't hurt other more timid horror movies.  Very rarely do you find a movie, much less a horror movie, that has this much fun scaring its audience one minute and then making them laugh the next.  This is probably the best horror comedy since An American Werewolf in London -- seriously.

It's frightening, funny, gross, and crazy -- a four-tiered cake of strangeness that only gets better and better with every delicious bite that is shoved into your mouth.  Drag Me to Hell is Army of Darkness on a sugar rush.

Selling the sheer awesomeness of this movie is Alison Lohman who plays the Hell-bound Christine.  Whether she deserves this punishment or not is something that should be debated amongst those who have chosen to experience this movie, but whether she does deserve it or now, Lohman is the perfect protagonist.  Desperate, vulnerable, and looking like she's going to have a nervous breakdown at any moment - pretty much what you would expect from someone three days away from eternal fire and torment and possibly a lot of Uwe Boll movies.

Justin Long (yes, that Justin Long) plays Christine's boyfriend and, I'll just come out and say this, this is probably the best suited role I've see Mr. Mac in; A supportive, empathetic, and loving partner who is also skeptical and a little stupid as to what is going on.    A perfect combination.

I loved this movie.  I loved every wicked camera move, every scare, and every disgusting uncomfortable moment of the insane five minute car fight scene.  Drag Me to Hell is everything horror should be and the end of excuses for horror movies saddled with a PG-13 rating to suck. 

Everything about this movie screams classic and the ending is particularly satisfying.  Drag Me to Hell is horror gold and if you haven't seen it yet, you're missing out on a hell of a good time.