Bewitched

Review by Jason Donner

There are days I think that Hollywood is bound and determined to take every classic sitcom that has ever been loved by the masses and turn them into horrible movies. Sure, you get the occasional break out that goes against the grain like Dragnet, but most of the time these big screen remakes are garbage. Putrid, rancid, stinky garbage.

The Bewitched remake – which really isn’t a remake, but rather a story about people remaking Bewitched – falls into the garbage category. Despite the fact that it has a strong and promising start, this movie falls apart faster than a 60’s magical jump cut.

We start out with Isabel (Nichol Kidman), a witch by trade who has given up the craft to live as a normal person despite the quiet objections of her father (Michael Caine). While trying to lead a life without magic (something that she has a lot of trouble doing), she is approached by conceded actor, Jack Wyatt (Will Ferrell), who wants her to play the part of Samantha in a new Bewitched television series.

Isabel is happy for a little while until she learns that Jack and his agent are keeping her in the background of the show to give Jack all the limelight and acclaim on the show. Instead of getting mad, Isabel does what any good ex-witch trying to stay off of magic would do… she falls off the wagon and gets even.

But then… dear God… the movie turns into a romantic comedy and the same slushy mushy crap that Hollywood turns out in your average Freddie Prince jr. movie. With that, Bewitched looses the little magic it had and becomes every bit as successful as one of Aunt Clara’s bumbling spells.

There’s no strong story but rather a series of scenes as if the movie is some lame variety show trying to connect its skits together like some 5th rate Monty Python rip-off. Ferrell and Kidman have no chemistry and Kidman’s decision to turn her character into some sort of empty-headed dunderhead who channels Marilyn Monroe makes her extremely irritating.

I found this movie to be overly cynical, pretentious, and lacking all of the charm that turned the series into such a favorite. The sad thing is, Bewitched could have been – and seemed pretty close to being – a scathing look at how Hollywood cannibalizes TV shows for materials. The decision to turn this movie into a shlumpy romantic comedy killed any chance it had of being unique and special and, if anything, this will be going into the Blockbuster bargain bin next to dusty copies of McHale’s Navy, Lost in Space, Wild, Wild West, and every other TV show that Hollywood has sucked the life out of.

God, what I wouldn’t give for the wit of The Brady Bunch Movie again and, seriously, I’m not being sarcastic.