Annapolis

Review by Jason Gaston

 

 They've finally done it. They have the technology. They've made a movie that is 99.9 percent pure cliché.

James Franco of Spider-Man fame plays a riveter in a shipyard who is accepted into the naval academy of - wait for it - Annapolis where he must fight his obstinate and rebellious nature while getting yelled at by other officers. Also, there's boxing.

Perhaps I'm doing a disservice to all of you by even just writing this review because, honestly, I pretty much tuned out of this movie half-way through and hardly paid attention to it.

There's only so many clichés that I can take. If you've seen An Officer and a Gentleman or basically any other (and better) academy movies, then you've seen Annapolis. Actually, you haven't because Annapolis does nothing more than just spit polish other scenes from movies, wrap them in a modern day layer of Saran Wrap, and then serve them back to you.

This movie is like thrice baked burrito day at a school cafeteria. Stale, bland, and tasteless.

This is a formulaic turd of a movie that never gets going and, if you do feel a little foreword motion from Annapolis, it's probably because it start sinking shortly after leaving port.

Annapolis is stiff, dull, and a complete retread. This movie is so utterly pointless and so comprised of fluff that it will probably take thirty philosophers to prove that it even exists in the first place.

This movie is 90 percent ass. Unless you like 1980's throwbacks complete with lame montages and the typical underdog makes good story, stay as far away from this collection of clichés as possible!